You know the type. The guy who has his own beliefs about prestige and power. The guy who lives in his damage causing reality without regret. Psychologists call these people narcissists. They play a dangerous game with people to control and to abuse. Narcissists are actors. They create a façade, and they steal personal energy whenever they can. They can sweep women off their feet with convincing stories and inflated promises. And when the narcissist feels the time is right for marriage, he will do and say anything to walk down the aisle or go to the courthouse to tie the knot.
But it doesn’t take long for these masters of deception to show their true colors. Many women put up with the irrational behavior and the lies until it’s too late. They have children, and they submit to the torture for the kids’ sake. But sooner or later, living with a narcissist becomes unbearable. His temper tantrums are more frequent and his abuse is more severe. The only recourse most women have is divorce.
But divorcing a narcissist is a high conflict affair. That’s why it’s important to find a lawyer who understands narcissistic behavior and can build a case the judge can understand. The divorce battle is a lesson in family warfare. The trauma-ridden spouse must explain the manipulation, abuse, control, and the devastating influence the narcissist has on the children. And the narcissist mounts a legal response overflowing with factual distortions, blatant lies, and character degradation
The judge and the professionals who are part of this process must weed out the lies and distortions, and take a look here, there, and everywhere for the real facts. But the experts don’t always get it right. The main concern in these messy divorces is the children. And some judges feel both parties are to blame for the marital breakup. When that happens, the innocent spouse goes through more trauma and pain.
For years, the courts didn’t understand narcissism. The courts didn’t understand how a mild-mannered man could turn into a Mr. Hyde in a heartbeat. High conflict people love to fight. And a court battle is a chance to use their pleasing personality to gain the court’s respect.
Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is real. We see a perfect example of a gifted narcissist in President Trump. The Republican Party would love to divorce Trump, but will be an uphill battle. And the reason it will be an uphill battle is people believe him. He is a master chameleon. And he will stop at nothing to control, manipulate, and create phony facts to keep his ego and the egos of other narcissists satisfied.
There are lawyers who know how to handle people with NPD in court. Lawyers like Phoenix lawyer, Ron Saper, and other lawyers like him, have the experience and the knowledge to deal with NPD in court. There is hope for women who need help, and the courts are trying to help once judges understand what a narcissist can do to a family.